Chucks + Sharpies = Love

Cake Porn

.... or "What Happens When Teenage Theater Kids Phone-in a Scriptwriting Assignment"

Taken out of context, these excerpts may be the funniest thing I've read in a month.(My commentary is in green; the rest was copied directly from the script)

Jeremy: Guys! Look we cant just save this cake for a whole month, look at the cake just look at it, its telling us to eat it right away don’t you see the chocolate frosting dripping by the second, its burning up its about to explode if we don’t eat it anytime soon. (ahem, really?) IT WONT LAST A WHOLE DAY TRUST ME!!
(grandma and faith look at the cake)
Faith: (bites her lip)it does look good. <- "dripping... burning up... about to explode" and it looks good? are we still talking about a cake? because if we are that does not sound appetizing.
Grandma: so we should put it in the fridge so it don’t melt.
Jeremy: grandma I think you should have a piece
Grandma: NO no I don’t think that’s right.
Jeremy: ( cutting a piece of the cake off) now open your mouth <- dude, that's your grandmother.
Grandma: no im not taking a bite
Jeremy: plays airplane with grandma trying to put the cake in her mouth..ereemm ereem(making airplane noises )open wide. <- and by cake you mean....?
(Grandma covers her moth and nods her head)
Jeremy:(making baby noises) aww the baby wants to eat aww the baby wants some chocolate cake
(grandma nods her head)
Jeremy: plays knock knock
(Grandma says nothing)
Jeremy: you know this is the part when your supposed to say whos there.
(Grandma nods her head with her hand on her mouth)
Faith: Oo ill say it <- Faith is his sister. I'm pretty sure what they sound like they're doing is illegal in most states.
(Jeremy turns to faith)
Jeremy: knock knock
Faith: whos there
Jeremy: chocolate cake that wants to go in your tummy(sings tummy)
Faith: oww (faith grabs the spoon and puts the the cake in her mouth) yummy that was tasty.
Jeremy: see grandma did that look so hard
Grandma: alright, alright you guys can go eat it only because jessicas very sick
(Grandma faith and Jeremy split the cake in half, and at the end of the day not even crums are left)

........

Jessica: (boyfriend Nathen comes over) Hey babe.
Nathen: Hey honey (walks to the living room)
Nathen: Hey honey what are you cooking that smells like rotton hot dogs with musterd. <- "cake" smells like rotten hot dogs with mustard? hmmm interesting.
Jessica: (face turns serious) I was making a cake.
Nathen: Dude what are you  making a cake for, there’s nothing special coming up, and besides if your gonna make a cake you should actually know how to bake one.(Nathen starts to laugh at what he said.) <- especially when you're making rotten hot dog cake.


.........

Jeremy: hey Jessica did my cake come 
Jessica: yes it did come I put it in the fridge you wanna see it it looks really pretty.
Jeremy: yea , can you bring it cover here for me im kinda busy here.
Jessica: yes ofcourse Birthday boy, you sit right there and ill get the cake for you. <- (+ previous 3 lines) Jeremy and Jessica are also siblings... fun times all around in this house.
Jessica gets the cake from the fridge and brings it back to jeremys room
Jessica: look
Jeremy: dam isn’t that a sexy cake <- and you're SURE you're talking about food?
Jessica: very
They both just stare and look at the cake for awhile
Jessica: ok well im put it back in the fridge before it melts
Jeremy: ok thanks
Jessica is walking out of his room and half way out the room Jessica drops the cake flat on the the floor (crack)
Jeremy turns his head around and looks at the floor with a shocking face.
Jessica: turns around with a smile on her face and says opps
THE END!
...........


Pure gold without the slightest bit of effort. Now for some "Ice Cream" to go with that "cake":

In the beginning, Block created Weetzie.

then Dirk and Duck, MSALM, Cherokee and Witch-baby etc. etc. etc.

 me: so the theme for march is based on a book series that basically changed my lifein 7th grade when i wasn't so cool i escaped into these books and the characters in them gave me permission to be weird, strange, slinkster-cool, artsy-fartsy and beautifulthey're the weetzie bat books written by francesca lia block

  about this girl growing up in california and her kids, her friends, parents

 JTan: wow, huh

  havent read them

9:34 PM which you probably figured

 me: so the songs are loosely based on the characters in the book

9:35 PM and the personalities of the cities that the author gives the readers
SOOO peeps, let your freak flags fly and check out the March mix here: Dwnld
(if you want to know more about the books this would be a good place to start: Dangerous Angelsand if you get hooked don't forget to find the latest one where Weetzie's all grown up: Necklace of Kisses )
On to the Track List!!1. Rag Mop Lionel HamptonJukebox Hits 1943 - 19502005
2. Yoo HooImperial TeenWhat is Not to Love1998
3. ClumsyFergieThe Dutchess2006
4. La BrujaSalma Hayek & Los VegaFrida OST2003
5. Love LockdownKanye West808's & Heartbreak2008
6. TeenagersMy Chemical RomanceThe Black Parade2006
9. Tangerine SpeedoCaviarCaviar2000
10. Give Me NovacaineGreen DayAmerican Idiot2004
11. It's in His KissMerry Clayton and the BlossomsYou're No Good1964
12. Suffragette CityDavid BowieThe Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars1972
13. Santa Maria (del buen ayre)Gotan ProjectLa Revancha del Tango2001
14. Bye Bye BabyMarilyn MonroeI Wanna Be Loved by You1953
15. Universally SpeakingThe Red Hot Chili PeppersBy the Way2002
16. Little Deuce CoupeThe Beach BoysLittle Deuce Coupe1963
17. LovefoolThe CardigansFirst Band on the Moon1996
18. Boogie On Reggae WomanStevie WonderFullfillingness' First Single1974
19. Tiny DancerElton JohnMadman Across the Water1971
20. Come TogetherThe BeatlesAbbey Road1969
21. Witch DoctorAlvin and the ChipmunksSingle1958
22. I Would Die 4 UPrincePurple Rain1984
23. Camel WalkSouthern Culture on the SkidsDirt Track Date1995
24. Midnight RadioJohn Cameron MitchellHedwig and the Angry Inch (movie version)1999